The A-Team (2010)

From the Pompous Thomas 2010 Review Backlog!

Oh boy does this movie suck. It really wants to be a fun, irreverent action movie like Shoot 'Em Up with an ensemble cast like Ocean's 11, but it lacks the inventiveness of the one and the chemistry of the other. Bradley Cooper in particular is a black hole of charisma that sucks any bit of goodness and light that drifts by. Liam Neeson is ok and so is the other white guy but the Mr. T impersonator sucks too. The group lacks the cohesiveness you need for this kind of movie to succeed and in the end it just feels like 4 actors playing different parts. AND YES, I know that most movies have actors playing parts, but you don't usually notice as much as you do here.

Cost benefit analysis: I paid $5 for a mid-week show and I want my money back. I don't even recommend it to fans of the show. Just watch your DVDs of the show, you weirdos.

Inception (2010)

From the Pompous Thomas 2010 Review Backlog!

Inception. Everyone saw this movie and mostly it was awesome. I was super-hyped on it for about two weeks right after it came out. I don't think much about it now. I guess it now seems really empty, especially compared to something like Winter's Bone, or even The American, now that it's been 3 months or whatever since I saw it.

Yeah, the effects were mostly pretty cool and I enjoyed the ride immensely. It was fun to talk about with people and read about on the internet and I even spent an hour at work drawing up a little dream level map. Tommy from Third Rock from the Sun was a baller (per usual), the guy from Titanic squinted a lot and it was fun to see the actors that Nolan brought in from his previous movies (this is my favorite thing, especially when the Coen Bros. do it). Ellen Page may or may not be a 12 year old boy, especially compared to Marion Cotillard.

The notes I wrote immediately after seeing Inception are as follows: "So awesome. Broke Kurt's mind. A movieto talk about, but still fun (sorry Blade Runner) Amazing cast. Amazing imagination." I don't know why I've cooled off on it so much. Maybe it's an Avatar-style hype burnout factor? Maybe writing a completely fawning review this far after the fact would seem completely redundant?

Cost/Benefit Analysis: Definitely benefits from big-screen viewing so if you can find it and are interested, go see it. To prevent this from being a completely negative/apathetic review I'll say that Cotillard was great and so was Tom Hardy. This'll probably be seen as a break-out role for him. The snow fortress/On Her Majesty's Secret Service dream level was great and if Nolan wants to do the next Bond movie, he'll have my permission. It is a good movie, but

Winter's Bone (2010)

From the Pompous Thomas 2010 Review Backlog!

Winter's Bone is one of those movies that deserves a lot more attention than it received when it was first in theaters. It was without a doubt the best movie I saw this summer (including that flashy one about all the dreams and everything) and I'm sure that come Oscar season it will be nominated for (but ultimately ignored for) a number of awards that it totally deserves.

I'm not sure why, but this one reminds me of last year's An Education. They certainly have nothing in common in terms of setting or plot, but they both rock some hardcore awesome acting, especially from a young unknown female lead. Set amidst hillbilly gangsters of the Ozarks, this is a detective thriller that would be far too much for the likes of Nancy Drew. These hillbillies are a suspicious and cowardly lot, and as our young heroine traverses the Ozarks searching for her missing father, she meets a fantastic collection of scoundrels and ne'er-do-wells. These are portrayed in an ambiguous way such that you never can tell if they're going to help or harm the poor girl. Oftentimes they do both.

Cost/Benefit Analysis: Worth full price. It's a beautiful, brutal movie that deserves every dollar and minute it asks of you.

Nerdy post script: Two actors from Deadwood! Always a good thing.

Obvious porn parody titles: Wiener Bone, Win Her Bone Her and Winner's Bone.

Iron Man 2 (2010)

From the Pompous Thomas 2010 Review Backlog!

Iron Man 2 is a nearly perfect summer movie. It's funny, exciting and ultimately kind of forgettable. I'm writing this review two months after I saw the movie and I can't remember much about it other than the basics: Robert Downey Jr. is funny, he flirts with Gwyneth, ScarJo looks super good but doesn't really do anything, Sam Jackson comes around and glares at people and then there's a big fight against Sam Rockwell (who plays a nerdier version of Tony Stark) and Mickey Rourke's evil super robots. At the end Gwyneth and Robert Downey finally give into their love just like Peter Parker and Mary Jane at the end of Spider-Man 2.

Like the above suggests, there are a ton of characters in the movie. I actually left out a couple: Jon Favreau as a butler or whatever and Don Cheadle plays Tony Stark's eventual sidekick. It's such a good cast that I enjoyed the non-action sequences better than the super hero stuff even though that was all really good. As packed as it is, the only parts that sagged were the Sam Jackson bits in the middle. But, I really like this grand Avengers project of Marvel's, so I'll allow it.

Cost/Benefit Analysis: I paid 5 bucks to see this one on a weekday, but would have been happy paying full price. It's full of fun and spectacle with a huge cast of stars having a good time. Get a big loud bucket of popcorn when you watch this one.

The Warlords (2007)

From the Pompous Thomas 2010 Review Backlog!

The Warlords is a Chinese historical epic from a couple years ago that was released in the States a couple months ago. It stars Andy Lau and Jet Li, a couple of big names that have been in awesome historical epics before, so I was expecting great things. Instead, what you got here is an awkward movie that feels like it was cut down from a much longer movie... but it wasn't. Ugh.

The movie lacks substance. There's one pretty brutal action scene in the Jason Bourne shaky cam-style that takes place about a third of the way into the movie but the rest of the movie is exposition, narration, and other boring stuff. Jet Li's army conquers city after city, but we only get to see the before and after. First the generals arguing about something, then when there should be another big battle (or at least a montage!) some on-screen text will say "They captured the city" or whatever and it's back to arguing.

I guess some people will get into the betrayals and love triangle between Lau, Li and Female Love Interest (I'm pretty sure that's the character's actual name), but it wasn't enough for me. I was pretty bored the entire time.

Cost/Benefit analysis: I paid 9 bucks to see this movie and... it wasn't worth it. It might be worth 2 or 3 if you're sick of Hero and The House of Flying Daggers and need an Asian action fix, but this isn't an essential movie by any means.

Fun Note: Wikipedia says that the movie had a 40 million dollar budget. It also says that 15 million of that went to Jet Li. I wonder if that's part of the problem...

Exit Through the Gift Shop (2010)

From the Pompous Thomas 2010 Review Backlog!

Exit Through the Gift Shop: Fun and games with the street art underground or revenge documentary? How about both! This movie has two distinct halves. The first half of this super-low budget documentary is pure fun and games with our POV into the thrilling world of street art; the one and only Theirry.

Theirry films everything he does. EVERYTHING. Cooking, sleeping, walking, talking, working, playing. He's a goofy and lovable guy and the artists he meets through his street artist cousin are like Robin Hood and coolest kids in school rolled into one. The time we spend marveling at their cleverness and laughing at their hijinks is some of the most fun I've had watching a movie. The second half is a lot different.

In the second half, Theirry stops hanging out with famous street artists like Banksy and Shepard Fairey and becomes the engineer of an elaborate industrial/commercial street art machine. Theirry stops being the goofy guy holding the camera and becomes an object of scorn. It's hard to see the movie and street artists like Banksy turn on our hero like this, even if he does seem to deserve it. But then you remember that Banksy directed this movie. You have to wonder if we're really getting both sides of the story or if this is just Banksy's way of getting back at Theirry for being such a huge sell-out, man.

Cost/Benefit Analysis: I saw this movie for free, but I was planning on paying full price to see it. The movie's truthiness is a bit suspect, but it's still a good story, no matter what actually happened.

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (2009)

When you think of Sweden you think of large, bulky people; the bland, colorless food they eat; and the flat, frozen expanse of barren wasteland that they call home. But I ask you, when a man takes the time to ruminate on this land of golden-haired giants, how often does he think of taut mystery/thrillers starring petite bisexual goth computer hackers? Probably never. Truly I say to you, maybe this ruminating man should pull his head out of the sand and watch The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo. Not just because it is made by Swedish people and they speak a funny language, because it is an awesome movie

I like seeing movies that I know next to nothing about. In the worst case scenario I see something new without the burden of my preconceptions; In the best case scenario I am completely blown away by the reality that such an amazing thing exists in the world. I imagine it's much the same way Christopher Columbus felt when he discovered America. The greatest discovery made in Dragon is the girl with the dragon tatoo herself. as a bisexual goth computer hacker, she is about as unique a character as I've ever seen. She makes her co-star seem about as exciting as a boiled potato. The character could have turned into a miserable Matrix-parody if it hadn't been played by an actor as capable as Noomi Rapace, who is surely destined to be remembered as one the greatest movie hackers in Swedish, if not world, history.

Dragon starts with two disconnected story lines that twist and turn unpredictably, even though I did manage to guess one of the mysteries. At times the movie is hard to watch and I'm not talking about the numerous computer research montages. It gets into subject matter that I don't think American movies touch on much. I was definitely uncomfortable, but that added to the experience rather than taking away.

Cost/Benefit Analysis: I paid full price and don't regret a thing about it. I positively recommend this movie. Special bonus: It's part of a trilogy! That means more to love. Extra-special bonus: there will probably be an American remake. That means that if you see this movie, you can be all pretentious and tell people that the remake could NEVER be as good as the original Swedish version. "Didn't you see it? Oh, you simply must. It's DIVINE!"